Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
i black out too much to be "responsible"
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
