Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
Randomize