id be glad to
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
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