You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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