:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
