can we get nightvision for the apartment?
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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