i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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