1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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