I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize
