Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Randomize
