I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
