i permit you to call me
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Randomize
