I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Randomize
