Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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