He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
honey bunches of taint.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Watching her eat just hurts me
Liz is crying about burritos again.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
