There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Randomize
