I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Your penis caused this!
Randomize