No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Randomize
