I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
