hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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