Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Alive.
So much puke
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Randomize
