If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
