I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
