Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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