Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
