OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Randomize
