I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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