Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
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