I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
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