Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
