Non-Jews are for practice
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Enjoy the penises
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Randomize
