Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
