what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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