What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
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