if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
