He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Randomize
