At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Randomize
