how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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