it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
