some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I'm having to shit out rocks
I'm really busy with my period
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