so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I got chris browned last night
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
