I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
