dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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