whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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