have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
I really don't understand how I cannot figure out how to work a fucking can opener when I'm hungover. Yet I still retained the ability to take a perfectly symmetrical picture of my erect penis and send it to every person in Matt's contacts the night before.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
