I'm so fucking centered right now
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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