You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
