singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I have grass duct taped all over my body
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
