So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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