I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
